You can’t make this stuff up

Jerry Sandusky’s autobiography is called Touched.

The customer reviews are the best part.  One review is titled “Jerry touched the lives and genitals of many”, another reads:

100% false advertising by Mr. Sandusky. Not a single page in this book “touches” on how to appropriately gain the trust of young, at-risk boys, and then use that trust to perpetrate horrifying sexual assaults on the very children who turned to you for guidance and support. Almost as disappointing as the first time I watched “Touched by an Angel.”